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Selling Out Show
Selling Out Show

Episode 44 · 1 year ago

Ep.#44 Walmart Warrior

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

On this episode of The Selling Out Show Dave and Toby discuss the pure joy of new underwear, a socially awkward situation with a senior citizen at Walmart, weird celebrity crushes, plus a dating disaster that involves too much booze and a freaky foot fetish.

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Hey I'm Maurice as a barber, you mightthink my scissors are my main tool, but really it's metro. That's where I gotmy eye. Prom seven. Its camera makes sharing my cuts as simple as Smith.Snap chair right now get an iphone seven with a camera that shoots four Kfor just forty nine. Ninety nine. When you switch to the number one brands inPrepa who met Yroo by Te Mobile Rule Your Day, reqire sport in a Vilitonumber, not com has to ant to move wrwor after on matural Hapnantininterpretation, piding an dependent AE, an TBOR pocounts Hach Housle herdd tobee by tion seven model, Oen, an EES, Wor Oo, housand tononmitions rmediawelcome to the selling out show feely owhat it does is reaches into you,a brain chemically and Lo Gatyour happiest memory chemically en block arthat emotion, pleased it chemically, and then it keep y happy Happyhello,hello, hello and Beyou fortuding into the selling out show where we struplife at our leisure. For Your listening pleasure, I am one of your host David,sholls and filling in for nate over here. By My side I have my grood paltoby scholfield toby. How are you I am doing excellent today? Oh excellent, Ilike the sound of that. The excellent means exemplary good. This meanssomething wonderful happened to you today right, no, actually, no, it's been kind of acrappin Gol, but I'm in a good I'm in good spirits. Right now so tuth theresthat locky lie O my listener's asshold. Don't you come on the fucking airwaves,a say, I'm great and you're really down in the dumps. You know I've had a a rough week, uh ththe old field's, not doing so great right now, and we got some bad news atwork. This week they cut our overtime they're trying to penny pinch, but forsome reason I'm in a good mood about it. Did you say: Penny Pinch or a pentypinch, Heny Penny? Okay, so you SD, like likepenny peeny pinch, peny P, like you're, trying to be hean about it or somethingheas, fucking, sons of bitchis ripping me off. Well that all sucks, so theygos the whole inchro of the show. You know come on now. How about you going,but I'm in a good mood about it? Okay, all right! Are you inebriated orsomething W W W? I'm PERF, I'm perfectly fine right now, I'm just I'mhappy to to be recording I'm happy to not have to deal with real life rightnow, great, I'm a distraction for you, yeah perfect! That's my the story. Mywhole life, you ask any woman. I've ever been with Um the rebound from BadNews, an distraction from tragedy. That's what I'm here for Hey! That's e!!that's why everyone's listening right, a distraction get away! I don't carewhy they are I'm ast glad they do right a new year right. This is kind ofconnecting to our last episode. How was your New Year's Day? Did you enjoyyourself? Did you celebrate what happened with Ya? I was your typical grown up that was inbed by like ten o'clock and went to work the next morning at five. So youdidn't see any balls dropping on TV. Your balls were dropping in bed. That'sright! Okay, that's the only only place! I I was dropping balls in my bed alone.Well then, the next day, when it's actually New Year's Dage, you wake up,renude or feeling good or ready to tackle the world in a New Light. Noit's just another day. I I'm not new years is not a a thing really to me.It's just it's just another day. Well, you know what I'm here to change thatfor you, okay, you know you're creeping...

...a little bit closer to being a man of acertain age and there's rewards for that. Okay, getting older doesn't haveto completely suck right. Okayb Li abut not completely, so I think what youshould do unde your Da, and this is honestly what I do and it reallytickles me pink. If you know what I mean is give yourself go out and buy anew pack of underwear for the New Year is what is better than some new UNDIES: Hey, you're, right, new new UNDI's newsocks. I get excited about new socks. Now you know you're you're a pennypinching over there, the oil fields- I don't know if you can go for the sock,undy duo on hes alone or should suffice to makeyou happy- and you know, reinvigorate your soul now now. Do you clean outyour drawer of all the the past years, undes and just start completely new? Oris it just you add a new pack to the rotatio? I kind o get the heat drawer.That's the problem. I it takes like a serious injury to one of my previouspairs of undes. For me to dispose of them right, get your money's worth out.Yuhey anwhat! You have accused the right guy. I am cheap as all get out,but no it's more like um any Seinfeld fans out. There might appreciate this.Like golden boy he's got this t shirt, that's tried and shrew and I's alwaysreliable for him. He can, you know I's been there for years and his drawer.Some of my unds are in fact similar to golden boy, which is a terrible termfor underwear. So let's get off of that thing, real, quick! But anyway, thepoint being, is you know they they're lucky or you know, I have somekind of association with Hem, so I keep them until they are completelyunwearable. But you know, the real thing here is that fresh pack- okay,okay, you know you're going to adorn your your little jollies with laterit's nice to know that Youve you've, given yourself gift to get Tho renewalfor you and your Um twigs and Berres yeah. So I actually did recently buy anew pack of underwear. Okay, okay, just just to throw in the drawer, have somenew ando waiter. I bought the wrong kind. I M I'm a boxer guy, you know yeah.These were the the brief boxer kind that you know they kindo squeeze I'mkind of a big Guy Um. I don't look real attractive in themand my M. my situation is situated tootightly to me with those. So I can't even wear the new underwear I bought wowo. Now, Nelli, you telling me: You went into the store, browsed the section perused theofferings and still bought the wrong type. I I I think what happened was Ihad the right type and I went through the sizes and just grabbed the one thatwas behind it, and it was a trick because I wasn't paying attention and Ibought the wrong ones. 'cause I when I got home I was like this is not what Ihad in my hand. You can' Return Theu. You know that right, you don't have tokeep them. I had already opened them and was like wait a minute. You juststill return. 'em. Do don't think it even matters me honest Wi, see I feelweird about that. So I just kept hom and I was like I will make this workand I have not made it work yet. Okay, all right! Well, I can kinda understand getting thewrong size, maybe miss reading the label. If this is l or xl or somethingbut to get like Um, you know breeze instead of box or briefs or something Imean there is clearly a picture of the man on front and you can see his junkand how he is. You Know Rock Anos UNDY. So that's a little weird yeah. You knowit was line bagged it you just Fuckig, I'm one of those KINDOF guys. That'slike. I know the size of my pants and I won't try them on so ike. I saw thesize, like I said I thought was in the same area, so I just grabed the bagthrough it and the buggy and when I' with my business, for I can reachbehind what you saw yeah he saw- and I...

...think that's where my error was- isthat I don't pay attention like I said with jeans with shirts, like I know mysize, I just I look for it and I throw it in t the Bugg and I'm like T. I likethat shirt. So it's here, do you go that whatever that's a problem? A lotof guys have we're terrible show. That's it right. There yeah, I'm aterrible, terrible shopper, terribly human being too, but we can talk aboutthat a little bit later I mean look at me, I'm the guy who getsexcited about new UNDIS on new years. But again, if you, you know wh, whatreally you know floats my boat. Now is if I get a sea, pat machine or a wrisprace, or I don't know, work boots, I'm like Oh, we go yeah. I made it so yeah,I'm fucking trust. You Me Iam lame man isn't isn't that crazy to think aboutlike if, when you were a teenager, none of those things would have been awesome,but as an adult you're like hail, yeah meed, some underwear, I eve me someholiday. I wanted all I wanted right now, don't have L to throw those nneedson my face. We know I may be old school like that,but I do want to bring it new school right now and let the listeners know ifthey ever want to reach out and talk to us. It is easy you can find us in allyour socials at selling out show or if you want to write me, an email tell meabout your undy experience or just called toby an idiot which is more thanwelcome. You can shoot us an email at selling out show at GMAL DOTCOM. So I had an experience the other day at everyone's favorite Walmart, and youknow I feel, like a lot of people have bad experiences with Walmart People Um and I wan to see if I was overthinkingit. So I went to the self check out. I hadmy ten year old with me and I'm sitting there talking to himwe're minding our own business, there's an o, a sweet old. Looking, ladies infront of us taking her sweettime 'cause, she looks like she might be. Ninetyyears old, that was double sweet, she's Goin to be a nice one. Yes, so I'm notin any rush. We don't have anywhere to go. We've only got a few things, no bigdeal, so I'm talking to the ten year old, just trying to pass time whilewe're waiting, we're talking about candy and we'retalking about the drinks and the little refrigerators and H. I notice that thethe old lady all her stuff is off the little conveyor belt, so I startthrowing my stuff up there. 'cause. I try to give her enough time. You know Idon't want. I don't want her to feel rushed as soon as I start putting my stuff upthere and we've already been standing there for a little while, as soon as Iput my stuff up there, the old lady turns and looks at me and goes I'msorry, I'm old and I have cancer and she she turned around and before,like it registered, I I was trying to like defend it and say no o no you'refine. I was just setting myself up here and I sent myself up there and then Istarted thinking Ye. Why did she add and I have cancer she had to pull thatcard out the cancer card? More, I don't know, maybe w some sympathy. You knowit couldhave been like I'm a fucking cunt and I'm treating you like shit,but you can't say nothing 'cause. I got CANC, that's how I felt hut reallyhonestly how I felt and I started thinking like, would I be an asshole if I W uld, if Iwere to like call her out on it, listen here, lady. You don't have to tell methat you have cancer. You know like I, a lot of scenario started runningthrough my head sure, and then I started thinking about like you knowseventeen year old, toby, dumb and young, and you know just an asshole-would have been like go for yourself. Grandma, maybe maybe not like that, butI wouldave. I would have smarted it off and said something, but I also had myten year old there and but Fri wanted to say something so badand ask her. Why would you even bring...

...that part up? Hu? Am I in the wronglike wwhat? Well, I death. Was She in the wrong? Wwas anyone in the wrong? I don't know it's Walmart. I think it's a lawlessplace. It's really it is pretty harming getting in there.You know what I mean but H. I think hindsight being what it is. What you should have done was just savesome really random shit to KINDOF, throw her off. You know if she just looks at you snaps like what are you doing? I Ga back in cancer. You Go. I I think cow jelly beads. Do you, likecounting jelly beans, they're, really hard to count ECAUSE, you want to eat'em all right away. I just see what she says to that likeshe PA Lookan E', be like H. I can't fuck with this guy, he's crazy, crazy.I say: Hey, I'm taking my cancer elsewhere. You know, I I don't know. Ijust fucking say something really weird or offbeat to KINDOF. Throw them off.You know return the favor yeah, but it just that's what it threw me off thatthat was her. Go too like, and I I was I didn't like Hoff and Pu. I wassitting there. Obviously talking about candy, I wasn't like sitting there likefucking old. Ladies he being slow. You know I didn't. I wasn't on the phonecomplaining I W sitting there talking to a ten year old kid yeah. I don't know it just it. Just was theweirdest thing and the more and more I thought about it. I was like. Why wouldthis lady do say that out of nowhere to a complete stranger,you know I again Walmart a miserable person. The moment they walk throughthei doors. It's like Um, an enhancer of fuckery that just makesyom even more miserable, like it's like a booster or you know. Kinda, likefucking, gives your DNA an extra shot of justbeing a fucking Dick. I don't know it's just one of those things of what TransYeah your white trash powers rejuvenate in Walmart. It's just the way it goes,but you know, like you were saying about young toby, saying Ah Fuck, yougrandma, of course. Now you wouldn't say that you did have a child with youeven that, and then too, if you did say that you know what y no you're notgoing to win. No, you don't mean anything. There's noprize to sayin, hey you just hold off a ninety year old lady good, for you nourthe asshole. If you do something like that, that's why I suggest to you nexttime that happens, spit something out just really weirdand just have them think you're fucking nuts, and let them go away in abouttheir day. But you know the more and more Ithought about this. It makes me on next time I met Walmart and I actually gothrough a line that has real people n T. it's not a self check, outll be neveryeah, but next time and whenthe, when they they do t e the pleasant. What isit pleasantries? The the? How are you today? Oh Yeah, the greeters? Well, Iwant to just stop and just be like you know, I recently went through adivorcerethir. I might be losing my job soon, because the oid field's not doinggood yeah free there, free eap and you get a little smiling sticker whenyou're done. Oh Man, yeah yeah, you know that's actually a great idea'cause. I I hate like every time you leave. Now they get ta scan everything.You know they see your soda like Hey, where you go with Hat Hawaii and plungetwel pack, man getit over here. I need to scan it. You know oh well, you know,while you're scanning my Hawaiian Punch, let me tell you about this or that youknow see what Ha happened there, because that that s, something thatdoes irritate me, I'm trying to get the fuckout I'veready spent too much time in there, as is so hat, I'm leaving. I want to go, II keep walking 'cause they can't here in Texas. They cannot stop you at, Oh,unless they have reasonable belief that you have stolen something. Did you hearthis from a cop? I've looked it up, because I wasgetting harassed at my local Walmart every time. I would try to leave,because I have long hair and I look like a Hippie and my ex wife had biggauges and a bunch of tattoos. We look like little up to no goodpunkass teenager 'cause. We both KINDOF, look a little younger than we actuallyare good for you, so yeah yeah, I think...

...you, but so I started looking it up'cause. You know it was bullshit and h yeahthey. If you just keep walking, they can't stop you unless they have belief that you have stolen something.So next time just say: Do you think I stole anything if they say yes, no orwhatever, just keep walking I'mjust going to run anyway, even if I lawfillypaid for it Tkn book it like I'm guilty, is sin tosee 'cause these fucking guys are just transient n in yellow fucking vest. Youknow what I mean they haven't had any calisthenics or exercise in probablythe last twenty years. I I'm surprised if, if they even had a solid meal thismorning, let alone anything else. So I'm was going to fucking high talit outof there ias like to see if they try to you know make pursuit. I doubt theywould so real, quick. Here's a side note. This is something funny h to tieinto my my podcast, the secret transmission plodcast conspiracies.There isn't a and I think, it's more of a like tongue, an cheek kind of goofyconspiracy, but it's still funny that Walmart is ran by Vampires Ohyeah.That's why they have greeters. Ah, to let you come in theygreet you to comein so you can come in. Oh, come on now get outethat's awesome. You know,that's awesome! No! It makesme Thinko like Buffy, the vampire slayer orsomething it doesn't make me think of. Like some legitimate, you know theWalan lark hanging upside down in a fucking closet like want to suck Yoblood. You know they resuck my wallet dry. Why the fuck that they need myblood yeah was that was e, interesting little tid be tossed in there yeah. Youknow if I can sneak a man, I try that's what you needed to use with the oldlady in front of you in line which s Lik Naana, whatever the hell she saidhe ust been like hey. Did you happen to know this store is owned and operatedby Vampires, then they'll think I'm actually crazy. That lovei see perfect.Now we went all the way around. We danced around this whole topic, LodiEde e, and the answer was on your shoulder entire time. You didn't needto come home with me. You didn't need to do that so now reached the part of the programwhere I would like to think the shows sponsors, because they provide somegreat products to us and, as a result, I get to give some awesome coupon codesto you. First Up, we have Northland Vapor Company and they can be found atNorthland Vapor docom. They are the makers of some truly outstanding eliquids for Vaping, and let me tell you something all of the e liquids andjuices are diketone and artificial sweetener free and you may be askingyourself. Why is this important? And what are you telling me this for wellin this day and age, where everybody's concerned about what you're puttinginto your bodies it's nice to know that northland cares about telling you whattheyare, putting in their product plus their motto is: Quality doesn't need tobe costly, so they're not going to rake you over the coals or rob your walletjust because you choose a healthier lifestyle evaping over smoking, and ifyou visit Northarn Vapor Dotcom, you can save nineteen percent off yourentire order by using codes selling out nineteen next step. We have spunk Loub,Oh boy, how I love me some smok makers of award winning Lubricans. I know someof you out there might be a little timid, might be a little bit shy andthink. Oh, I don't know if I want to use those, I don't even know if I wantto order those well first, let me tell you: the shipping process is incrediblydiscreet, you're, not getting a big package in the mail. Ther screams, hey,I'm buying lub. Second, you know what love life can get a little bit stale.You might need to spiceing it up and the best way to do that is with sponk.Why all the professionals in the adult film industry have all the fun whene.You can bring spunk right into your home. Trust me, try it go to SMONKLUBDotcom today, and you can thank me later. Last but not least, we havealpine hemp. The C bd Revolution has...

...arrived. If you haven't heard about Cbd, yet you're truly missing out, as it can really help you with stress sleepissues, pain problems, you name, it there's a whole littny of things. ThatCBD is there to help you with I'm an avid user of CBD Myself, and let metell Ya, Alpine hamp com has everything you could possibly need from oils totinctures to gummies to edibles, you name it. They even have pet friendlyproducts, there's no better place to go, and it is truly a one stop shop. Plusthe website is easy to navigate whether you new to trying CBD or you like me,have been using it for quite a long time. You were going to love Alpinehemp and now's it time to try it because if you go to Alpineham DOT COMand use codes selling out nineteen, you save nineteen percent of your entireorder, auther already low prices. So what are you waiting for get on overthere and remember when you shop, Ath our partners? You help support the show,and for that I thank you. When I was a teenager. I had a buddy ofmine who was completely enamored with a celebrity and and that's normal. Youknow a lot of people th, they have a celebrity crush, or I know even coupleshave a list of maybe celebrities. They can kind of get a free pass or hallpass on. It's all. Fantasy is never goingto really happen, but its natural.You see stars or these, these rich folks, and you think, Oh boy, I'd liketo tap the hell out of that. You know his was courtney. Love now mind youback then, in the nineties, her style and stuff was in. It was cool to you know, be alternative to be rock orwhat have you, but still she was not the ideal, I suppose celebrity to becrushing on so we kindo gave him heaping rations of Shit. You know yougot a picture of her in your bedroom. I mean come on. Look at her she's fucking,you know, taste is subjective, but she's ugly as a day is long here. She as ugly as the day is long. So this led me to ask you right now: Haveyou ever had an owd crush if you will for any anybody onthe boob tube or in the movies or music or anything else like that of notorietym? Okay? Okay, I've got a C. I've got a couple slemperty crunch, who you gottwo holy cow at you're Yo. I've got two and then a third one, just because I'mI'm a sick human being, we might deem you sick after we hear the first one,so, let's just kinoe through those first, so one of my early celebritycrushes was Jennifer Tilly, Oh sure, Si loved her in bride of Chucki Yeah, butthat's n notweird she's very attractive. Well, no, no she's, no she's thatthat's not one of my weird ones. I don't think I mean I haven't seen herin years, but it was just that one movie that I was like: Oh she's, soholitaches and and Briht of Chuck Y's, a terriblemovie so doesnit matter now. I also have a a infatuation with a and this person haspassed away: Britney Murphy, Oh yeah, yeah from eight mile and Um Yep, aclueless right. My favorite movie that she was in wascalled across the hall, where she's a she's being accusd she's in a hotelroom and she's being accused of cheating by her husband and he's in thethe hotel room across from her, and she doesn't know that he's in the otherroom and they're on the phone. The majority of the movie, so good, okay,that sounds terrible but they're on the phone, the entire movies,the majority of the movies. I I D, I really want to pay to see someonetalking on the phone but uh okay, so these first two tay ot that far fetchit's not somebody that Yo'd Kindo be...

...ribbed or made fun of for admittingthat you like how they look. So, as here number three, the number three nowit's it's not a crush, but I want to see her boobs. Oh well,that's, okay! That's IT E just wanted to! If I lashed,I just want to be flashed, but she has two passed away recently. G now isgetting creepy. Well I mean I don't want to see like passedaway boobs but Beth from dog, the bounty hunter. What all CA bads are so big, Ike, obviouslyso big. I want to see. I just curiosity. I need to see Iwanted disease. Well, I mean the whole thing with that is: Do you just need tosee a big pair or specifically her be because I used to love dog, the bountyhunter and just one day I was like her. Boobs have to be really reallyweird large, large yeah way too large, Huh, so yeah. I justwanted to see her boobs. That's that's! Okay! I well again, this is you know alittle awkward and now that Sheis none of this earth anymore, yea. No! Yet No!No! No! Now it's it's a weird topic to talk about a year ago. It would havebeen funny er well, for me, you know I'm trying to mentally process what youjust said and I'm thinking I could just show him any huge rack. No, no! No!It's got to be best Ha. Then there's gon to be something else about her thatyou like. No there's nothing. I don't think she's attractive. I just I think,you're lying to me and you're lying to yourself something else going on here. I don'tknow! No! I don't know I mean you could go on any website right now and justlook up genormous tite yeahand. You would probably find something verysimilar to what she was rocking. Probably so you could just imagine herface on the neck and biggin o bad, but see. That's that's why it's it's like acrush 'cause. I, but it's not. I don't know it's. It's a sick, sick obsessionthat I had yeah. Well, let's not call it them a subsession 'cause. That makesit feel like. I just sit there and think about her boobs in o room all allday. I actually have a headcold right nowand you just made something irupt on my face. I just chortled hat. We just saidwhich is bad. Thank God I'm not on the utube right now, but uh Rightyeah. Souh I mean again the first two normal the last one is just yeah, that's weirdthat that counts. I'm sorry I feel like I have to apologize O. I don't knoweveryone that just heard me h be so weird. Okay, all right! Toby issorry, so that does it for our celebrity crushes segment. I like tomove onto something else now you ask for that to be that. Well, yeahI mean I guess, just to close everything out.As far as me, I've always kindo liked an exotic look to begin with so peo whoknow me, wouldn't think anybody that I foundattracted to be too far fetched out of the realm of h. You know something thatI've already expressed interest in. I suppose the one, though, that if Iever bring it up, you know you sit wit, your buddies on the couch and you'reflipping through TV and you're, like O oo, Stop Right there and they say why,and I go. Oh look, niece nashes on T v NIACY NA. Who is that you don't knowher. She was on okay, good, Google, it, but she was on a few show. She was onlike one of those house flipping shows, but she was also on Reno nine one, oneo okay she's on that new show where it...

...was't neushow claws. For some reason, I always found her very appealing andpeople really wanted to bust my hump about it. Why I mean what do you think tolster? Ithink I'm on board with you ar you see. I think I'm on board. All right I mean would just be that I want to seeher boob sell. No, Oh, no! No! I'm just kidding she she'spretty he's very pretty you're not kidding. That's the worst part you're,not even kidding. In the least I am seventy five percent yeah yeah yeahtoby schoolfield, the breast man. I strikes again nwill playbut the gir theyrunlayandmotoby. I love hearing about your personal life and, to be honestwith you, a lot of it since you're, a single guy, I s fairly tragic. Solately, we've been ending thes show with some of your woes, your datingwoes, and I was wondering, have you brought any more to the table thisevening? Yes, I have like, I feel, like I getreal personal on your show. Like I open up, this is like a free therapy.Sometimes I talk about wanting to see celebrity boobs all suddn stinker, likethe Walmart Guy. I really will I'm not fucking aroundI'm going to send you a sticker, so threyou go ahead, all right, so I Ireally want to see what you think about this particular story, because I didn't think of it as a date. Okay,so let let me be very clear: it was not in any way shape or form a date in mymind. Well, let's hear the story first and then we can kind of decide. Youknow what the social structure was for the whole thing. Yeah you got Ta tell me becauseeveryone that I've told this story to they're like that was a bat that wentreally bad. Okay, let's hear it so um on my tender I was, I was all swapping.I saw a friend that moved away about fifteen years ago, so I haven't spokento this person and I was confused because I knew they had movedto California and they were showing up in my area. SoI got on facebook to find her and sure enough. She wasback in Texas, so I added her on facebook a week or two goes by and she acceptsand I message and I'm like hey how you doing I haven't, talked to you n a longtime. Not Again, I didn't swipe on her on tender 'cause again. This is an oldfriend, but at this point she has no idea. You went from tender to facebook,which is like from ass to mouth. Yes, okay, Yeh, I y. When you put itthat way, I feel like now I'm a little bit of a creeper but n, I touyes and hewere't. Yes, you are damn it. This show is not making melook good right now, he's fine anyway. It makes me look terrible. All the timecontinue. Please...

...so h she says: Hey. We should get drinksometime and catch up and stuff, and I was like cool that sounds awesome, sowe did just that. We made plans. We were going to go to a terrible localbar. That's here in my town, 'cause. She lives in the next town overcurrently. Ah, she came over to my house and she brought a bunch ofpictures and we're looking at like high school pictures and and middle schoolpictures, and we ended up going up to the bar, so we're sitting there having a goodtime laughing talking about old stories. You know where we've been in the lastfifteen years. What's happened just doing all the catching up and uh, she starts drinking a lot yeah a lotyea. I have a buddy who is always at thisbar who sat beside her on the other side of her at the baryeah and he starts hitting on her course. He's no dummy. You know unlessyou say this is a date first off and I brought this girl now. My Buddy is trying to hit on her,who is also like fifteen years older than me so and her 'cause, you know we're thesame age H. Somehow he starts talking about herfeet and ends up massaging her feet rightthere in the bar at the bar and UH. You know it's kind of a littleawkward. You know it it's not a date. Can I interrupt you right now 'cause. Iwant to correct something. Okay, I just mentioned a few minutes ago that I'vesounded creepy on my own show plenty times before. I've never been this creepy, so you dohave that distinctive honor. Now, congratulations! You Wan to do that'screepyis! OL! This old storey is starting to creep me Te fuck out man,okay, okay, let me keep Os Aly ly as far okay, so this guy is like telling her that he's got a footfetishand stuff, while I'm sitting here y h again, if this was a date, my buddy isa terrible wingman and h she's getting more and more drunk,and one of my other friends wait keeps walking by talking shit to me Wuc. Doesshe pull out her feet or no? Well, he took off her shoes and- and he started massaging her feet andwas talking about. You know her feet. Ok Ar all right, so the otherbuddy comes up. He he keeps walking by we're doing the whole like a fuck, youbuddy Kinda, you know thing yes, you're longail bonding as lo.You Walk You areon, so she's getting really drunk rat thispoint and she kindo starts throwing in jabs as hewalks by and he starts throwing jabs back at herlike who the Fulk is this chick? No one talked to her. You know doing the I'm aI'm big, tough guy next thing. I know he walks by and he's doing the samething. She stands up and goes straight to him and grabs him by the back of thehead and pulls them in and starts making out with him right Thereoh. So you got fucking screwed on that D.Did you pay for any of these drinks or Apaing Foro Christ, so your he broughtthat you payit for the drink. She a sweet gay look at these pictures of usin high school, then creapy old, footfinishd guy comes up which afootfinish to me is weird anyway, because why would anybody discriminateagainst male feet versus female feed? That means you' just goin like ohe. Youknow what I mean. That's a good point. Okay, so he's all fucking he's shunn.Now he was trying to do the whatever foot fucking assault and then this oneguy treats het like absolute shes, laid, who the focus this broad she's likecome here. I'm Goingta Kiss You Yeah Huh, and so now, like everyone at the youknow, 'cause, I I I frequent this bar.

Everyone is looking at me like do yourgirl just make it out with other dudes, but that wasn't the case. So let me just ask Wa: Do you think thisstarted out as a date and I I'm oblivious to like knowing what a dateis and then it just went really south because I don't know how to date- and she wasjust like Fok this pussy I'm going for some men yeah. I think I think youfucked up to be honest with you, because you Wenonwith her Yhou're, the one who paid for her to get lubricated mentallyright, you're, the one paying for Yaring, so you buind her o drink. Sodid you continue to buy her drinks? All the shit was going on. I probably bought her another drinkertoo. Yeah see you know yeah June sorry, but I'm not trying to condone takingadvantage of other people, especially not women in that kind of situation. No,no Byo, but I mean it's like you set up. You laid the foundation for the house and then everybody justkindof jumped in and was like hey now it's our house and you're like no, butI poured the concrete. I don't care, I'm living here. You know what I mean.That was the hnorible thing to say, but that was the first thing that came intomy mind, but you know that was your territory. If you will to stake a claim on I'm making this even worse, I'msounding like you now, I'm getting creepy. But U but yeah t you fucked, OP, okay, okay,see again everyone that I've I've told the story to I'm like they they're like.Oh, your date was making out with other people. No, she I don't think it was adate. Never intended. Did you talk to her the next day. Didshe leave with the guy? What happened was the aftermath? What was the Fallo?We ended up going out to Ihok and then I brought her back to my house and shegot in her car and left really so you let her drive drunk. No, we she soberedup. She was much more sober after ehop and everything s Pantans. Oh here go meto to add to my my poor SOB story, so I had to go to work. It was three orfour. In the morning before we got back to my house, I had to go to work atfive, so I got an hour of sleep. ND got home and my cat was sick and I had togo put him down at the vet that same day wow. We got that lookat that gee it was. It was a shittytwenty four hours he day goes off. fucking plays footseas with some oldGuy Mak ell with another guy. Then you fucking cat goes to fucking kitty.Heaven, no terrible toby, that's fucking awful, but then me and her wentto a concert a week later so did you pay for it? Yeah Yougo, the son of a bitch? Oh, my God,I'm Aomine, God yeah good! Lord go ATA DA. What do you think yeah Imean come on. You know. I mean this whole thing. You went again youfoundeon tender, then y. You were interested enough to connect onfacebook and you physically went out places you paid for everything and Iyeah yeah come on now I just well like I said she was a good friend in highschool, so I was but okayyou were interested, correct, um. I think she's attractive there. Yougo yeah, okay, but I I wasn't like now. You got me in a spot because Idon't feel like I was trying to to zoomin sweep in like that yeah. Well, trust me, you would have if given theopportunity that you didn't get but Thi Day, Hey I'm a gentleman yeah, I sureare Oget that right. You are quite the gentleman footing the bill. You like that punny throug in thereyeah yeah...

...knew something was going to happenafter you said footing the Billeah for all that and her her escapades there.So yeah, sorry dude, but that was just a bad date. Yeahwell seems like astring of 'em a couple of 'em. You know so you know, did didn she stop talking toy. u like: When did she cut it off? We still talk okay. Well, we haven'thung out in a while, but, like you know, I I text her see Hastein and she takesme every once in a while w we talk about music a lot. We have a lot of thesame music interests and uh yeah. We we ta, we always talk aboutmusic. Okay, mostly, should recommend this show. You should tell tell him totil, I listen to the selling out show. I don't think I'm going to do at onlyperson, I'm not going to promote it to really as too bad, because you mightactually she might look at this in the error of her ways and you could have alove connection there. I could be uh cool or actually good, chuck woollery.Its E real chuckwillery is a fucking piece of shit and you know make a loveconnection for you. So you're missing out, buddy yeah, maybe yeah wellnow,you know Toaby, you didn't mention it. This whole time, but I I've been sick. I've had this terrible head cold, butstill I am here producing content for all the fine folks out there right'cause. That's what I do. That's what I enjoy to do. I love doing this. You digyou love hearing your own voice, all that too, that is included, but I likeputting you know our lives out there for people to listen to some people. Hcan really dig it enjoy it get some value out of it, hopefully more than Imaybe than I even do myself. So I want to take a second and think each andevery one of you for listening today. I truly appreciate it virtual hugs foreach and every one of you do you feel that right now that is me squeezeingyou and I'm probably too close to you and you've caught my cold so take that Funo Banyway. I am Dave that is toby fillingin for nate, and this has been selling outinfirmary media how to show up with Coca Cola, energy,get', tired and you're thinking of cancelling on your friends. Don't do itevery time you cancel on a friend, a Unicorn loses its horn and becomes aregular horse. Do you really want that on your contents? Instead grab an icecol can of Coca Cola, energy with delicious coke taste and reinbigoratingenergies. Keep the UNICORNS alive show up every day with Coca Cola, energy,energy. You want taste, you love, Hey, I'm Maurice! As a barber, youmight think my sissors are my main tool, but really it's metro. That's where Igot my eye. Phom severn its camera makes sharing my cuts as simple asSmith. Snap chair right now get an ifon seven with a camera that shoots four Kfor just forty nine. Ninety nine. When you switch to the number one brands andPreepag O Metrobi tea mobile rule your day, reqire port INAVILITO member, notcom, ask to ant to Mobe orpor after onactural Hasmanti, Ander petition,Tiinin ndependen ae an IT wor potounts uch hous Ertoe by Tife, seven Lodel, Oe Erses wor or e Tousand, ten onnitions.

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