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Selling Out Show
Selling Out Show

Episode 29 · 2 years ago

Ep.#29 Indirect Amends

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Our esteemed hosts are easing into the summer with a handful of topics to discuss for your listening pleasure. They talk about Nate’s life on the reservoir, swimming with critters that give Dave the heebie jeebies. Then Dave’s back problems prompt a look at the issue of painkiller prescriptions.
Nate looks back at a few cases of MRSA (the serious staph infection) he remembers witnessing during his time in jail, and the imperfect science of jailhouse tattoos.
Dave turns 41, which gets him thinking of some of the shameful behaviors of youth that he’s since overcome. We learn that it’s possible to really change, and to become better people.
To finish things up, Nate’s Notes revisits Black Metal, but focuses on some of the artists who have done something new and interesting within the framework of the genre.

1:18- Reservoir Reservations
3:04- Dave’s Back and Painkiller Issues
11:19- Jailhouse Tats and MRSA
25:36-At 41, Dave Reflects on Some Past Mistakes
34:32-Nate’s Notes (Black Metal Variations)
44:29-Clip: Come On Down by Zeal and Ardor
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This is no ordinary subshop. This isfirehouse optired of overpriced lunches that under deliver on flavor head tofirehouse ups, where for a limited time you can get a four ninety nine choiceof choose from a medium smoke, Turkey, Virginia Honeyham or roast beef. Theircustom made hot subs and a price ready made to make you smile just four.Ninety nine, only at firehouse sups enjoy more subs, save more lives,participating locations plus tax. On the time Offel pesesmiary for dilipery I've got a Viryo of Jerry FalwellJunior vaping from a Philopian Tube Moiyou were now tin. The selling out o what it does is reaches Intowa, brainchemically and OKEC. Your happiest memory, chanically Anin Block on thatemotion, rased it chemically, and then it keep her happy. Happyallo, hello,halone and welcome to the selling out show we have a Gretan land for youtoday. My Name is David Shilt by my side is my partner in crime. Maersinsteed made how the heck are Yo good, I'm a little little sticky andsweaty. It's been pretty hot U' Here, but I'm not complaining about it. Man,I've been waiting for summer. All fucking years, so I'm I M, I'mwelcoming it. I live on a lake. So could be worse. You get out. I urightit y there all this waininess and e sticki ISS begone, just by jumping inthe lake, even though I'm a little weary of lakes because of what kind ofcreatures liveing there yeah you know, yeah, I'm the KINDOF Guy I'll get outof the lake, and then I need a shower anyway. B'cause, I'm afraid, there'ssome kind of weird like Ameba, right right or P on me. I hear you man, weware like as a reservoir. It's fairly cleanere. We go yeah, but occasionallyyou know, there's definitely kipvers and whatnot, and some of the kids. Iknow that, like my girls, son and some of his cousins are a little weary to goin the water leery rather to go in the water, because the the fish nevle had their toes and oneof them swears. They saw a snake, but hey, I'm, I'm okay with it. There'snothing. GOINGTO eat, YEU, there's no! NO SHARK! In my La No, a e, like mylake, is cleaner than yours. It's a reservoir. I A okay, it's much clean! Isaid, don't worry about the kid as nibbling at your toes. They don't hopmy kidens, don't poop! I Li IX ESA thefancyc yeah. I've always had I don'tknow you said: There's no sharks in thereb ever since jars, fot, one I'mafraid yeah something's, going to nibble on me and then too there's awhole lot of P and poo. In there I mean there there isn't a pool too. At leastit's chlorine right right, Kinda cleaning that out for you, but me andthe great outdoors man. We just don't mix anymore, we're not made for eachother. I am far beyond that Y. I'm in Pan alle in Har. I'm sorry to hear them. That's myterrible Larry Flint inpersonation! I I can't do a good one. Do you get a goodLarry Flint? I, I suppose I'd order, a Cappuccino ina I'd. Get a a Lotta, an a dill iwe Gad,a vidio of Jerry Falwell Junior vaping from a Philopian tube. You knowbut, I'm in a lot of pain. I'vehad a lot of problems with my back. I've had a couple of surgeries and nowI'm sitting in limbo with my doctor, because they don't want to give me Payimedication because of the opiaid crisis. Okay, yeah, the pendulum has swung the otherway the doctors you know used to overproscribe now, they're afraid toeven medicat in New Jersey. I had a doctor who prescribed Im to me liketake tax, and you know I A it was legitimate, but I'd go in and be likeman. My Pains Li, you know, is it a one or ten today, I'd be like it, ai eightshe'd be like Oh ok, that dose give 'em more, and I was always a big fan ofpurcases because who was e e e feel good. You knowphysically Rightbut, I felt like Superman. I was up and Atim ready to go.I guess in a Wai, it's almost like! U And I don't want to go to the samedegree, but as far as your energy level...

...a and everything it's like cocaineright, yeah. Well, it's a it's a attitude of juster. It's a you know. Definitely that's that's one of the bigissues with opiates. It's not that people always assume opiates, knockpeople out, they think of Heronexas. These people drooling and fallen over,but man to the people that use them. You can't really get out of bed without'em y. They give you the energy they give you that feeling of of yeah youcan take on the world man. It's it's strange. How things sometimes work theopposite way. You think the way outerall is given to hyperactive kids.Most of us get an energy boost from Adaral or Ritelin, but the people thatneed them. It actually focuses them and makes them super yeah like they. Idon't want to say they calm down, but they they're able to settle and focusouothat. One H W, yes, exa and that's basically where I was coming from withmy payments too, is as much as I was hooting and hollerind about how greatpercasens were. They actually helped my mag significantwe, and now I'm in thisspot, where my doctor doesn't want to give me anything. I've had some xraisone. It's shown that I have scoliosis, which Um really is common. I guess wefrom what I found on Google again, the worst thing Yo cand ever do is Google,but I do it anyway, and and they were like yea kids, it goes away, there'sdifferent variations of it when you're older it couldn't that if it'sdegenerative so you'e got to be weary of that 'cause. This is Scolius is acurvature of the spine, exactly it', not yet not aligned and I've never beendiagnosed with that before even having two back surgeries previously two Lamonectomes Um. So I'm I'm alarmed you know so I'm like well, I guess we need theMRI and she's like you absolutely do. My Insurance Company has denied it nowtwice twice, so I I don't know why I getthese rejection. Letters she's. Basically like reading Greek, you knowfor me, you know the letter will read. Our independent position has reviewedyour file and found with conservative forms of medicine. You might be able tomanage your pain, how the huck does he know that, just by the xray, wheneverybody else is recommending, I get the Mi what the fuck is going on here.So I finally I've had a lot of problems recently. My doctor, this is decide thewhole test, osterone debacle for any of our previous listeners. We've heardamong that. I won't talk about that now, but you're more than welcome to jumpinto our archive and dip into my test, Osteron pool it does sound very disgus,wonderful, and I bet you Wa inoer hareer than your reservoir. OK, YEA! Now it's like my doctor's KINDOF,washing her hands cleaning her hands with me, shes Li okay. I I referred youinto paying specialist. From now on, you go you go to her, I'm not givingyou anything, I'm not going to recommend any more MRIs t e insurance.COMPANYS is not doing anything for you with me, so go to them. Instead, maybethey'll have better luck and I'm like yeah. Thanks are fighting for yourpatient dog right she's, passing the buck and O Corse. I calld the pain,management specialists and they're, like Oh yeah, we'll see it in about amonth. We're booked? U And I'm like Youe, going to be fucking kidnme. Sohere I am, writing in misery waiting for someone just to say, Hey. Let mehelp you out you poor crooked basted, when it was an issue, though th t theway it swung back pendulum was when when it was the other way and they wereoverprescribing, I mean I knew people were in Massachusetts. I knew peoplethat would specifically take a ride, drive down to Florida and hit all thepain clinics they could down there because their records weren't interlocked intermingled. Whatever you call it, they they were completely separate,so these people could hit one after another after another. All these painclinics drive back to Massachusetts, with hundreds of percassets and oxeesand Vikin all these opiates, and because the pint clinics were justthey're like stores, men, you'd just go in and they were giving 'em to anybodyand just to to finish Thi Offi. I was actually in conquered state prison overa decade ago with a gentleman who seemed completely out of place. The Skywas very proper, very, very meek and mild. Older Gentleman, probably in hislate fifties, early sixties. He was apparently all of a sudden. We saw himon the news one day when he had gone to court. He was at the time the famousCape Cod doctor, whatever they call them, th DTR feelgood of the Cape, andhe was prescribing people left and right and I ate being an addict inthere for drug related activities. If you will, I used to get intoconversations with the guy because he was under the the opinion he had. Hewas of the opinion that whoever...

...needed these things, whether they wereaddicted, however, they came to be addicted. If they came to him, he waslike look. My issue is: If they have access to the drugs, they need they'renot going to commit the crimes. They're not going to do all the problems, andbasically the supply is the only issue, so he was thinking as long as they justhave what they need. What's the problem- and I myself have always pointed tosomeone like lane, Staley from allison chains, where, if someone has unlimitedaccess to their drug of choice, eventually all you want to do is thatdrug and your habit gets bigger and bigger and bigger, and before you knowit, that's all you're doing lane staley from allison chains was, would lockhimself in his house for weeks on end and when he died, no one knew he wasdead for overm, because no one would ever see him anymore. So my argument tothis doctor was just there's more to it than just the criminal problem likeeventually it does take over your life, so the best route is always to get off thedrugs. Folks, an yeah, I'm sure the doctor wanted awasn argment the doctor.I you know I was driving to Mazarati. What are you fucking talking about B t?You are absolutely correct. The best thing it is to get up drugs if youdon't need to take the drugs, but if you are in pain, right, tough, nuggies,now Bayby, you W and hopefully ID assume Florida sticks to tyour system,because I just thinking about the like they're just using paper, it was likethey don't even use Lek Erona, no forms of a communication, anymore recordkeeping yeah righlieth on the fucking, chats they're, just sticking with it.You know technology fuck, you technology, yeah! That's that's! FUCKEDUP! It's interesting! I don't know if, ifyou've ever seen the the look of the Jailhouse Tattoo dve,there's there's a very specific looksee, Chinsy Jailhouse Tats, you know and yeah they they have a look, and I wassurprised actually in my years of of being in jail. I did see some qualityink, some great artists that actually did some great work, but the problem isthe ink fades of course, overtime. 'cause they're, not given real good ink,the the the ink in jail that they use fortattoos is made basically by burning plastic weather. It's isusually it's usually the disposable razors that you buy. On canteen and youburn the handles the me, the plastic rather handles and you put a paper bag over the burningrazor 'cause. The floors are stone. You don't have to worry about burning thefloor. So U so you burn this razor. You Light It on fire. As it's flaming up,you put a paper bag over it, standing up over it to catch all the smoke whichacts both to Kinda cover the smell a little bit. So the guards don't smell,I as easily, which you know it, doesn't really work, but anyway th. Then, whenyou're don, when it's done burning the inside of the bag, the paper bag iscoaded with a fine layer of swot black coating. You know over the Bak, so youbasically scrape all that black dandard off the bag. Yeah. It's like a powderat this point, a black fine black powder- and you scrape it into acontainer. You have this black powder, then they mix it with water andbasically it's just I beleve water, and then they throw a little soap orshampoo in for some reason- and this, I believe, is just jail. How todod thisis like jail H. I said Ai Jsteriisy, that's exactly what I think T. I thinkthat the jailhouse folks think it makes it all cleaner, 'cause, a lot of thingsthey do in J. don't make sense, you know, but people have their reasonslike for, for example, people make homebrew and they'll have the fruit andthe sugar and everything which is all all us. Wan O make home, but some ofthese people will throw bread, l slices of bread 'cause, they say. Oh, it's gotthe east man, beer has, he they don't realize. East and bread is alreadyactivated and dead. It's not making your alcohol and Yoatder from what Iunderstand, but they do it and that basically just makes it so you havethese clumps of soggy ass, red infremented, re fucking grow, so fucky too imazine drinking and getting theChunp of is like Raylmilker. So it just sounds so or healing it's awful man,but but back to the the in so yeah they basically that's all. It is man, it'sjust the water and whatever, whatever disinfeg and soap or whatever theythrow in the e mix it with the black powder and then whatever they make aTatchou gun out of a motor from the hair clippers on the block or whatever,and they make a needle out of asharpend...

...paper, clip R or a piece of the screenout of your window. They break off and make like a little needle. It's on theraining mouse, but but due jail is all jelous macgivers, like I've seen peoplesmoke crack out of a chicken bone and tit's like I lie her, I believe, but so jlust Attoo s. It gets methinking of these. These two guys, man, I don't know if our listeners rememberit was a big thing, a few years back and I'm sure it's still an issue in alot of facilities, but Merca it's a. It stands for Methicilin resistant,Staffalakakus oreous a mouthful, but it basically means it's staff infection.It's a staff infection, that's resistant to Methicilin, which is likea strong ANTIBIAC. So it's basically super super staff infection and anyopen, sors open spots and your skin are susceptible, especially in facilitieslike a jail or hospitals, ha e Merca all the timeironically, but anyw these two guys that I knew got locked in they werecellmates and they got locked in together. They both got whatever it wasa week of Lockins for some reason, so they had a Tatoogan. They were bothTatoo artists. They were just like a fucket, well just sit in here andTattoo, each other for the week were locked in and just be covered with inkby the time we get out so dude these guys just yet they were writing on eachother. These shidyass tattoos, they weren't the best artists, and so after a few days we notice they'recalling the nurses over because they noticed they Wereann all these blistersand Brie fuckin fresh tattoos, e eithe're, all gross and infected. Theyhad to fuck and tell the nurse to 'cause. They got to try antibiotic andthe Shis Serious Dude. You know it's ECONDMERCI. They were trying to denythat they were fresh tead tos, like it's just the coincidence that thesemercive bubbles just happen to be forming under some like scabed up inkon them, like on top of that, when you go into jail, they document all yourexisting tattoos and scars and whatnot so for identity and Ando know if you'regetting new incomens exens of offence in there you know so so these moronswere getting shitty tattoos made with ash and Shampoo, and then they getbubbles all over themselves. They get lugged to the fucking whole. After that'cause they are tacheing each other and they lose their good time that they'debeen a cruwing and and on top of it yeah they S, contract some crazy staffinfection, that's really hard to Puck and cure. So anyway, those dudes wereyes, not the brightest guys, but but anyway, I don't know man this. I got methinking also about so the Mersa got me thinking about this dude. I used to buydope off on the street and I didn't know this guy from jail really, but Iknew him on the street and he was in a wheelchair when I met him because he had actually lost his legfrom Mersa that he got in jail, and I don't know if it was from Tatos butyeah. He Du, he lost a leg and he had he had a big lawsuit going against thejail. When I knew him like, I said it was onthe street, but the lawsuit was still going on at that time and he sold dopes.So he was one of those dudes that holds a sign on the street corner like thehomeless gys. They call it steming. He stem for cash she's, staying on thestreet with a sign for some reason, the call it Stenmin, but I would call thisguy ahead of time and he would hobble over from his spot on the corner. Wherewas signing over to the Duncan donuts or whatever, to go, use the publicrestroom and then in the rest room. He would remove the appropriate number ofbags of dope that I had ordered from inside his crutch where they werehidden. It was pretty fucking clever, you know people weren't searching hiscrutches or even thinking about like then he would go post back up at thestreet corner with the Shit in his hand, dope, and I would drive up hand him themoney and he would hand off the dope and it all just looked like. I wasgiving this bum money out of charity. So nobody was, nobody was Awiserdd, itwas pretty clever, you know I I don't know that was it was pretty smart,smart Dute, I don't know how we cantracted the mercy, but maybe I don'tknow I don't know whatever happened to himlike if he ever got that settlement, but honestly dude. If he did, heprobably just oedd Ondop with it, you know and knowing the guy he probably oeand died before he ever even saw that money it. He was like D, he was a roughjunk. He just like this old trick and...

...crusty junkie. That spent the majority of his life on dopeand t the worst thing do that I think about him is that that settlement that he had against the coming from thelawsuit or whatever may may have fuckin been the besst thing to happen to thisguy, like I know, that's really sad but like it's, it's just Goina fucked uplike that Dai's like Ye, I lost you know I lost a leg and I was in jail fora long time, but duigot all this money coming. I can get so highy, listen, Oown d. He Won. He got the money, a he started to eat internet start up and creating a company that that sellsa new kind of crutch with various compartments, tellehole things and he'sactually like a millionaire right. Now we don't know wellwe'll, see hem onSharki, see him on Shn. I do I DHI funny like people behind. You must havebeen thinking like. Oh here's, one of those mother fuckers that gives thosepeople money. What a Nice Guy! That's a nice guy right there giving that poorson of a binch ten dollars. HOW ABOUT WELL! I mean I' go there with anywherefrom he sold forties, so I'd go there with at at least forty BOC. She rboswatching and they're like Jesus, this G, that's a really nice. He just hand hima couple of TIG thing. I'm thinking about is these twoduds that you told me that ended up contracting the Merca, if you're, ifyou're in the Il- and you tend Toin Chitty tattoos on each other for a week,there's going to be like you know a moment of lost inspiration at at somepoint where you just like doing Tik tacto on the boneater's feet, orsomething like that. Just for Shitz and Gayway, I mean how man have you if youwere in there for a week how many tattoos coul you think of right, I'm stopping myself from saying fromyou know what you'd actually want, because I think at that point itdoesn't even matter what you do or do not want, but butell like what would sound like agood, good or bad idea like if someone said to me yeah, we put a dragon onyour wrist you're like yeah cool. That's bad! A but then you know, fourdays later, it's like yeah. What about? U? Tweedi bird on your ankle man, you know what what's left to do, yeah, how many crosses and fucking rosery beYouan. Do An spider web tattoos. It is a jailhouse and you see fucking, spider,webs and Roseries do that was always the tattoo it as like. I I had l a fewbids that I did. I let people know that I was an artist which is well that Idraw that was a shitty thing to do, because people are always bugging youand if you want to, if you're, that APU dude, you can make a ton of money. I'vementioned before there's a lot of Jilouse entrepreneurs but dude. If youI'm not the type that likes to draw on demand, I just like to it on it. Whenit strikes me yeah and these people would be like o Shdo draw a picture of my kid. This you know draw picture ofthis and it was always do everyone has a pair of hands, praying with a rosarywrapped around them and, like whatever saying please forgive me or Mama, Itried or BH Lah Blah. You know it says it as ubiquitous or whatever as thetear drop or Barm wire, a yeah or the lightning boats on the white dudes. Yousee a lot of the. I was going to say h, the one I thinkthey should bring back is the tiger clawing through the skin that needs to make a triomphan return,O People's bodies everywhere 'cause. Now it's all fucking differentlanguages that people don't know what the fuck it means anyway right right.so He's a white frat boy with the fuckand Chinese cymbol on his neck, andyou know that they're jokingly, you know Asian people are putting like I I don't know. I eat human waste. Youknow our weird symbols that say stupid Shit, you knowthey're people are like.Oh, it means pride and honor, but then a Asian person looks at it and GigglingEaus, really sote Ye ea hop star whatas that one ArianaGrande and she dii open on her hand. Some kind of I forget what language itwas and, of course she immediately had to rush to insegram to show off thatshe's gotta. This ink on her hand and then people floct to reply. You saythat is not what that says. You have in Hraw and of course she musthave been fucking embarrassed beyond belief, but hey that's the culture welive and everybody's going to be. Like look at me. Look at me I'm first or Oh,my God. Look at this cool thing. I got it's like shut up and shut the fuck UFrelax everye wants to be unique and the funny thing is people conform intononconformity. If you know what' sharing they all, they all thinkthey're being unique, but they all end...

...up doing the same thing. So they're allthey're, all doing the nonconfamous thing. So they're conpaled- and youknow just t you don't mind me closing this out here. My thought is motherfuckers to go get that foreign language shit that you can't understand, or youdon't know what it is tattooned on you, here's what's going to happen, whew ere,going to lock you in a hot cell with two dudes with massive cases of Marsafor a week sure we all know babing saves lives, but now I want to save you.Some money, visnit northland, vapors, dcom, probably made in North Dakotanorthlern papers, line of liquids contained no artificial sweetners arediketoned free and won't cunk up your coil, whether you're quitting smokingor an experienced papor northland carry's, a variety of flavors andhardware, making it a one stop shop for all your baping needs. Northlandbelieves quality doesn't need to be costly and right now you can use coadselling out nineteen and save nineteen percent off theiare, already amazingprices. So what are you waiting for? Get your head into the clouds and shoponline at Northland, vapor, docom or visit their locations and morehead inMamigi Minnesota some products containd, nicotine adults only so as of tomorrow, as my child does not.Let me forget, I will be forty one years old and he doesn't let me free. Ibecause he constantly reminds me dad you're going to be forty one or if mywife says Oh daddy's, birthdayis coming up n, he goes yeah he's Gon to be fortyone and I go well fuck. I I know exactly how old I'm going to be. Thankyou a little man for for making me feel like Shit. U Anyway, and is always likearound these times in life. Where you reflect, and you look back, you know atfirst you're grateful especially with living the lives that we did we well. Imade it this far anhi in itself as a triumphant thing and it should becelebrated. I should be happy and in honesty I am even though I'm more ofone of those guys that I prefer atmosphere over gifts o. If you knowwhat I mean like experience. Well, wh N, when people say oh we're going to havea party for you we're going to have cake, we goin to have this. That's allfine and Dandy. I don't mind, but for me a perfect birthday is just like aday of relaxing like you, don't need to buy me a bunchof Shit, I don't ead a fucking, you know expensive this or whatever I meanthey're nice and I din get some presents this year that we're very,very kind and very thoughtful. Don't get me wrong, but the mostimportant thing for me is again the atmosphere how the day goes, if I'mable just to be happy and be with my loved ones. But back to the reflectionthing is. I started thinking back of my life and I have a lot of regrets. A lotof people do you know, and one of those things that I wish Icould change theres a laundry list of them, but onething in particular that kind of bothered me this year, more than anyother, was how badly I treated women in the past, Oh yeah, and when I say this,it's not because I was abusing women hitting women. Well, I should stopmyself ma M. It probably was a form of abuse, but it wasn't violent Ri. Inever hit women or or did any kind of violent ATS. I treated them likeconquests, especially when I was younger. I viewed all women is sexobjects and there's a couple of girls in particular that I can recall thatwe're you know all over me and interested God only knows why you knowI mean mind you. I was an okay looking guy back, then I mean, if you look atme now you mean like who the fuck would fight over you fan as, but still in Um, one of Hem. I I spent the night with one I kicked herout. The other girl came in and I was treating her bad and I made her performa sex act on me. Okay and I said, if you do this well, you can sleep in mybed, but if you don't you have to go to sleep somewhere else and it s who whothe fuck does this and anyway, I woke up that morning and she wasn't in mybed. She was on the little love scene across the room, a I know a and I'm I'mnot it. It pains me to admit that this is the kind of person I used to be and mind yow. It was a long time ago.You knew me then yeah you knew I was then, and I was terrible yeah. We wereall you know te an at that point in Ti yeah. Yes, I was a foolish kid, buteven then I should have had more respect for women and ESPEC, especially theones that ere willing to you know be involved with me Y. I have A. I have asingle mother who worked very hard to raise me without a father. You knowwhat I mean. I never had any sisters or anything, but I should have taken heras an example and and thought to myself. Well this girl or that girl that I'mnot treating so well ore being rude to. How would I like it if someone treatedmy mother that way- and it sounds very simple and basic when you put it forthlike that, but but that's because it's the right thing to do. It's the rightway to think right, unfortunately, is taking me. You know all these years to well, Ishouldn't say all these yeavbeen good y.

...i try to live a good lif. You know whatI mean, but it made me a long time to finally realize that was bad fuckingbehavior, you know what I mean sure man it takes a while to to learn things. Ittakes a lot of break behaviors, break habitual behaviors. You know, and I don't know man. I did a lot of things,obviously, that I'm not proud of my life too, and we all can just hope thatthe decisions we make going forward are better and and then you put enough goodexperiences behind you and next thing you know it's. That's your new habitualbehavior. You know the good ones. Are the become habits, so I don't know I well speaking of thesame son. That's a pain in the ass, reminding me I'm forty one, every everyten minutes is. I try to instill in him. I've got to treat people well, you knowreally do well, that's the thing. I can't do anything about the past,nothing and n. It kills me. What all I can do is affect the world I live innow and do have best. I can not to be some kind of toxic fucking lunkhead,you know or or exhibit that kind of behavior at all, because I reallystopped acting that way. I was going to say my late twenties, maybe yea. Sohere I am at forty one. Finally, looking back on not fuck but H, it's Ispent more time, I think, being a Fuckwad than I have been a decent humanbeing yeah, but your the scale is is tipping. It's gradually going the otherway. Man, you know the years are adding up and and it's interesting in the twelve stepcommunity, the whatever the secret societies, if you will th the wholeeighth and ninth steps, are all about making a list of amends and in theninth is you know, making the amends and they're they're well documented etalk about them in movies and whatnot, and the thing is: There's there's an issue that a lot of peoplehave where the amendns they need to make can't be made whether the person thatyou wronged is dead. There's no way for you to contact them, or they just don'twant to talk to you or whatever it is or it's it's something that it's toogeneral, it's not one person or one thing. You just feel bad about asituation, so they suggest what's called making indirect amends where yeayou do something positive for in that person's name, if they're deador if you can't contact them, you you do something that you know they wouldhave appreciated or they would like you. You help someone. If that something that would have made themhappy or you don't eat money to a charity. They would have liked or youwhatever it is you you kind of pay it forward. You do something Nice, whilethinking of that person rn with that intention, so those are called indirectamen. So you know at the very least or not at the very least. That's that'sjust something you can do rins, so yeah man. I think it's enough that you'vechanged the way. You not only act but think about things, and hopefullythat's all. We can hope for man we get to stop objectifying women actually,and you know now I hear these stories about. You know women getting catcalled and everything else I mean on and on where women not getting equalpay for equal work. All this stuff, just fucking inariates me an. I worrythat I contributed to that in my past and I really want to change the futureanyway. I can, and- and this potcast I guess serves, is one way because Icould ave said. Oh it's my birthday. Look at me, everybody' say HappyBirthday, but rather than that I said it's my birthday. Look! What kind offucking piece of Shit I was. You know what I mean like look. You know, and Ithink I don't know lot lot of times for me and I am a very conscious guy aboutwhat I did and everything else like that. I I I just really wish. Maybe mymessage would get out to somebody else and they'll go dude. I don't want to belike Dave. Looking all thoseyearslatery angryfilled with regret over my behavior. I Ho, I hope anybody out there listening.If you are acting that way, it's not too late change. Now 'cause, I live afucking happy lifeday from the selling out show here and tellg you aboutSponklu Ponloom is a Malti award. Rinning Moverigan used by professionalsin the adult film industry, smok is available at Hybran, pure silicon,natural n, Pi Spok is made with the highest quality ingredients and isnonstanding hypoelogenic and cleans with ease enhands. Your Love Life WithSpo right now, spunk luge, is by three get one free, there's no excuse not togive it a try, Punklu high and Brodic for an affordable price in its Pung Loudocom. Today, and you can thank me, Laterodo or L in time for na now ofthem segments in which I've mentioned...

...black metal. Before, on the show, it'sa colorful genre of metal music with anequally colorful history, I don't need to go into the theatrics and costumarythe corpse paint, the leatheran spikes. I don't need to remention the church,burnings and murders that marked the early Norwegian Sea. All this stuff hasbeen gone over ad Infinitem, but not just me, but by countless books,magazine articles and film documentaries. It's inherentlycompelling subject matter saying nothing of the actual music, but ofcourse the music matters sure it's interesting to know that abunch of Scandinavians were worshipping Satan and committing arson and murder,while dressed up like Weird Viking metalheads with painted faces, butwithout a unique musical identity. Black metal wouldn't have spread outcountless other countries and thrived the way it has in the years. Sincethose fabled beginnings in the early nineteen nineties, black metal startedas a more stripped down gritty reaction to the overblown and almost mainstreamaffiede death metal scenes. At the time. The signature black metal sound backthen was largely and underproduced ones. SCRATCHY and fuzzed out lots ofdistortion over frantically tremolo picked minor key melodies on the guitar.A lot of simple and primal blast beats on the drums, which were mixed somuddily that it was just a hissy blur of noise sloppily, keeping the beat thevocals were screeched harshly and unintelligibly. Often the lyrics werein Norwegian or Icelandic, but you couldn't even tell especially the waythey were mixed into the rest of the distorted blur. I realize that the wayI'm describing those recordings, one might assume it's unlistenable garbageand it's definitely an acquired taste, but oddly the speed of the guitar anddrums just gets swashed out by the gritty production and the result is aunique musical atmosphere that is really much more than the SOM of itsroughly recorded parts. As time went on. A few bands started experimenting withthings like keyboards in somewhat cleaner recording techniques. Somebands would even put elements of norse folk music, anchanting vocals in theirsongs. It definitely added to the unique identity of the genre, but as ascene started by Grumpy purists who were rebelling against too many frillsin their metal music. There was a fair share of blowback early bands likeMahim and immortal who stuck to the neanderthal pounding on drums andguitars, had a lot of fans who thought it was too wimpy and Cheesy Dad Sintean actual singing to the mix. To this day, there are the black metalequivalents to the Simpsons Comic Book Guy, who refused to validate anythingthat isn't quote true: Black Metal, meaning anything recorded audibly oranything that dares to step outside the strictly basic formula created by theoriginators. But to most of us the bands that do add some differentelements are often the most exciting in the decades. Since that initialScandinavian explosion, black metal acts have popped up in countries aroundthe world, from Asia to South America, France and Greece to the United States,and while there are a number of them that stick to the tried in trueoriginal formula, it's become more and more common to use that originalformula as more of a canvas to work. On top of I mean to me, the mostinteresting bands from those original acts were the ones that added keyboards,et Cetera, to spice up this new sound emperor was one of the first acts tocome out of Norway in those formative years and they used keyboards andpretty complex rhythms to make their own more symphonic version. Of thatsound Olver was another one from that. Firstpack of Norwegians, who actually moved on from the very traditional and basicsound of their first few albums to create some truly unique inexperimental work ever since. Nowadays,...

I don't think you could even classifyover as a black metal band at all. They work with electronic instruments andproduce mostly ambient music and trip hop. A few bands like France's BlutausNord, which I guess means northern blood, have found that industrial musicpartners well with the Black Metal templet they've produced a lot ofreally cool albums. Alces is another French band thatformed later on, but they worked in a lot of elements of shoe gays and indyrock a strange pairing one would think, but the sort of dark sombre feelings ofshoe gazs, as found in bands like my bloody Valentine or slow dive Meshpretty seamlessly with black metal acest, has a huge following and forgood reason. They actually inspired a lot of bands to create similar music,of course, with its own subgenre title now, called Black Gaze Insert irolehere. The black gays phenomenon has caused alot of controversy in black metal circles. I've already mentioned howfans of the genre are pretty attached to genre normes and can be resistant tosay the least, to changes in their beloved scene. At least alcest keptsome of the visual trappings going for their early work. The real problemstarted with some North American acts working in the Black Gayz structure,death. Heaven is one of my favorite bands in this subgenre they've gottenmixed reactions from the public at large hailing from San Francisco,they've, basically ditched the whole spikes and corpse paint thing for yourstandard, hipster, haircuts and skinny jeans, maybe a leather jacket or two,but these guys are charismatic dudes that smile a lot and that just pissesoff a lot of crimugenlly purists. I know it sounds petty and silly, and itis to me if someone is making genuinelyinteresting music, then I couldn't care less, how they cut their hair orwhether they wear and the bullet belts and spiked bracelets. But these blackmedlers are passionate to say the least. So, as a result, deaf heaven is oneband that gets a lot of hate, at least in the comment section of Youtube andto finally get around to the suggested song. For this episode. Zeal and ardorare another band that did something new with the black metal template. It's thebrainchild of one guy, actually manwel, Ganyo or Gagno. I'm not sure you say it,but he's a Swiss American artist of byracial descent, not that it shouldreally matter, but black metal unfortunately also has anunfortunatesubset of racist fans not to get into it, but one of the subgenres F blackmetal is NSBM or national socialist black metal. I'd rather not acknowledgethose acts, but I'll just say that when Manuel from zeal and ardor firststarted releasing metal on his social media pages, after initially being likean indie chamber pop artist, he asked the listeners online. What they thoughtwould be an interesting combination of genres for him to try mixing being a black man. Manoel got somecringeworthy responses, including one that said, troy mixing black metal withenword music. But, of course, they said the word which could have meant likehip hop or ran B mixed with blackmetal, but Manuel, took it differently anddecided to blend black metal with old times slave music and blues. The ironyis that this guy was trying to insult manoel and inadvertently gave him anidea that was new and exciting in ultimately, zeal and ardor gained allkinds of Buz in respect for their work, so insumation black metal is a genrethat, despite occasionally being resistant to change, can really be anexciting field in which to explore new ideas. If you can get past all the harsherelements, there's a lot of stuff for a music fan to explore now for those listeners who maybedidn't get a chance or didn't feel...

...listening to the song suggested, whichwas come on down, buy zeal and ardor, we'll just play a little clip of it.BFOR you guys Heri, so yeh, I don't know. I I thinkZalanardor is one band that definitely they take elements of things that maynot sound completely unique, but the way they put them together is unique.And that's that's what I was getting at about. You know them I. I know it's notyour cup of t you're, not a metal guy at all, but could you at leastappreciate the the elements that he threw together and he way did it at allor we yeah. You know I like the most is a back story that you told me about theH, the racism yeah and it was like okay.This guy wants to come at me like this. You know what I'm going to do that andis pretty pretty it's ingenious yeah. It really is, sothat's a really great approach. Right man, like a few years ago, th the song,full disclosure, is actually a few years old and the first thing that heput out was some, I forget, is a short ep that hejust put online. It was never released physically and it got so much buzz.Somehow I guess nowadays, all these sound cloud, artists or band camp andwhatnot people are breaking through that way. So people started listening and he got reviews bypopular you, tube reviewers and whatever, and the Buzzz was created andhis next album his full length, which is called stranger fruit, which is agreat album, is yeah. It was looked forward to, and you know, highlyanticipated by critics and it really didn't disappoint. I feel, likeeverything he's he's put out, I has been unique. Some of it gets a littlerepetitive, some of it. It's all done by this one guy manwell he plays with alive band. Obviously, but all the music he records is just him with recordingonto a computer is all done by this dude and yeah yeah, like I said he wasguy yeah. He was online and was asking for suggestions like and, like you saidhe he he took, he took the lemons. People were throwing at him and madbook in Black Metalemonee e. You Go and also speaking of suggestions. Ifanybody out there ever wants to reach out to us. It is easy you can find thison twitter at selling out show on facebook at selling out show one. Youcan give us a call and leave us a voice mail at seven, seven, four, seven! OhOne, nineteen. Ninety three, we love to hear from Yo and Y ou know yourthoughts too. On this whole nate note segment, because I'm really diggingthis setting us up with a song an episode ahead of time, thing that you do in here. I like it. Ithink, that's cool. So what do you have Planin for us next? Well, to be honest, I was, I wasn't sure youknow where down to the wire here. Recording this and I'd realize I just Iwasn't sure so, I'm gonna I'm going to go old schools, nothing new! Here Inever claimed to be breaking new artists here. I just wanted somethingthat will pertain to what I'm going to speak about next week, so I will throwout the song new dawn fades by joy tivision. We will post a link to that on oursocial mediapages and we will yeah talk about it next week. Right on soundsvery, very cool. I look forward to that and before we let you all go, I do havea couple of notes about fellow podcasters I wantd to bring up someguys that we really care about first off. It's Chris from the ProfessorFrenzi Show I' Gon to say. Thank you Chris, so much because he keeps gettingme out of some comic book. buinds and uh he's not someone. I know like in reallife. Personally, you know what I mean yeah only on the Internet andeverything, but he couldn't be a nicer dude. The professor frenzy show couldnot be a better program. I mean they shut us out every week, absolutely putthey put forward top notch content on indy books. If you're into that checkhim out, but Hehas been sending me some...

...swamphing books that I have not beenable to get hold of on my own wow. I it's really really kind. That's gold toyou. Oh babyf, like nobody's business, and actually I've been reviewing theswampting television show over at the gww com. If you want to, you know, readthose maybe get my opinions on. What's on e screen a we say from sourcematerial O screen cause, I'm a I'm a Taglime othe buthe. Only thing I wantto mention is our friend Regi who actually had a guest appearance on thisshow and s from the cosmic treadmill podcast.He fell ill seriously ill h to the point where he could have lost his life,but luckily Jesus is right. Luckily, he bounced back, and I really didn't wantto I've known about this for a while. Now I really didn't want to bring it upuntil I knew I had good news and thanks to his partner on his show, Chris we'vebeen informed that Reggie is doing well, he's doing great ex she's talking againhe's moving again and I couldn't be happier he's a real nice guy and anasset to the podcasting in Conix community, so good for you, Redyou andI hope the best for you and your family as now as for us, it's time to hit thebricks the party's over you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here andyou want to think each and every one of you fortune again. We y appreciate itvirtual hugs for all of you. I am Dave that is nat and this has been sellingoutinfarmeymedia. This pod cast is sponsored by oasis. APAYCHECKS COMPANY OASIS provides small and medium sized businesses withan allin one solution to simplify back office complexities like paynroll benefits, HRand compliance led oasis, take care of the HR administration, so you can focuson growth, your customers and continue to run your business fearlessly, learnmore at oasis advantage. Dtcom slash, plod cast hey I' Maurice as a barber. You mightthink my sissors are my main tool, but really it's metro. That's where I gotmy eye. Pon Seven. Its camera makes sharing my cuts as simple as snip snapchair right now get an ipon seven with a camera that shoots four K for justforty nine. Ninety nine, when you switch to the number one brands infreepad metro by Te Mobile Rule your day require port in a Velito number,not com, acto, an to over Erpor. After on Matraland Past Mantin, andtherpetition Titin Independent Dae and it wor Perhous that house ter toe bi ionseen model o Tey Hav E for Une posand confongitions.

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